7 Harsh Truths I Wish I Knew in My 20’s (I Would’ve Found My Purpose QUICK!)

When was the last time you looked back and thought, “If only I knew this earlier”?

In this episode, Jay shares the seven life-changing lessons he wishes he’d learned in his teens and twenties—insights that could have reshaped his relationships, career, peace of mind, and sense of purpose. These aren’t just reflections; they’re powerful revelations most of us only discover through struggle, heartbreak, or burnout.

Jay dives into what it truly means to speak with intention, to know when it’s time to let go, and to stop outsourcing your self-worth. From learning to stay quiet in a world that rewards noise to realizing that boundaries are an act of self-love—each lesson is a powerful reminder that growth isn’t always about adding more, but about releasing what no longer serves you.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

Why Saying Less Makes Your Words Matter More.

Knowing When It’s Time to Walk Away

Why You Should Talk To People, Not About Them.

What Stress Reveals About a Person’s True Nature.

How to Raise Your Standards Without Guilt.

Why Some People Miss the Old You (for the Wrong Reasons).

How to Stop Absorbing Others’ Emotions and Expectations.

This episode is for anyone feeling stuck, overlooked, or overwhelmed. Jay reminds you that you don’t get what you deserve — you get what you accept. And that sometimes the most powerful transformation happens when you choose peace over performance, presence over perfection, and truth over approval.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. 

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there! 

What We Discussed:

00:00 Intro

01:37 Things I Wish I Knew

03:27 Lesson #1: Speak Less, Say More

11:57 Lesson #2: Let Go Before It Drags You Down

17:34 Lesson #3: Talk to Your Partner, Not About Them

21:43 Lesson #4: Understand the Whole Person, Not Just the Parts You Like

28:05 Lesson #5: You Get What You Tolerate, Not What You Deserve

32:52 Lesson #6: People Cling to the Old You Because It Was Easier to Control

36:22 Lesson #7: “Bad at Texting” Often Means You’re Not a Priority

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Vanessa Van Edwards: Stop Overthinking Every Social Interaction! (Use THESE Cues to Be Liked, Respected, and Build Confidence in Every Conversation)

What usually holds you back from starting a conversation?

Can you remember a time you avoided someone out of fear of saying the wrong thing?

Jay sits down with behavioral researcher and bestselling author Vanessa Van Edwards for a powerful conversation that blends science, honesty, and so many surprising moments. Vanessa, who refers to herself as a “recovering awkward person,” shares how her biggest social struggles became the driving force behind her mission to crack the code on human connection.

Together, Jay and Vanessa dive into the fascinating world of charisma, exploring the 97 cues, from eye contact to tone of voice, that quietly shape how we’re seen and understood. Vanessa breaks down why so many of us feel overlooked or underestimated—and introduces “signal amplification bias,” a concept that explains why the signals you think you’re sending might not be landing the way you expect. Vanessa shows us how confidence isn’t always something you’re born with but something you can build, with intention and awareness.

The conversation goes even deeper as they unpack the tricky balance between warmth and competence, especially for women in the workplace, and how vulnerability isn’t a weakness, but often your greatest strength. They explore how to create those magic “me too” moments that form instant connections, spot the hidden red flags in communication, and let go of the need to be liked by everyone in order to be truly seen by the right people.

In this interview, you’ll learn:

How to Make a Great First Impression Without Saying a Word

How to Break the Ice with a Simple “Hey”

How to Balance Warmth and Competence in Any Conversation

How to Create Connection Using “Me Too” Moments

How to Exit a Conversation Gracefully (Without Offending Anyone)

How to Spot a Liar Using Body Language and Micro-Expressions

How to Ask Better Questions That Spark Real Conversations

How to Recognize the Difference Between Charisma and Manipulation

Whether you struggle with social anxiety, want to level up your leadership presence, or are just tired of surface-level small talk, this episode is packed with practical tools and uplifting wisdom to help you connect with more authenticity and power.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here.  

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there!  

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

00:51 From Awkward to Empowered: Overcoming Social Anxiety

02:43 How Do You Really Want People to See You?

06:44 Why Aren’t Your First Impressions Landing?

10:01 Why They’re Not Getting Your Signals (And What to Do About It)

13:33 Want to Be More Attractive? Try Being More Available

15:40 One Simple “Hey” That Can Spark a New Connection

19:16 Your Vibe Teaches People How to Treat You

22:06 Speak with Power: Unlock Your Full Vocal Power

23:47 3 Conversation Starters That Actually Work

29:49 Making Friends Doesn’t Have to Be Hard

31:17 Why Compliments Alone Don’t Build Connection

33:30 Break the Ice Without Sounding Like Everyone Else

38:36 Stop Trying to Be Interesting, Do This Instead

40:48 The Art of a Smooth and Respectful Exit

44:32 Use These Nonverbal Cues to Steer the Conversation

47:41 Spot Inauthentic Behavior Before It Costs You

54:28 Why People-Pleasing Feels Safer But Actually Holds You Back

57:48 How to Tell If Someone’s Lying (Without Saying a Word)

01:00:04 When Narcissists Feel Like the Most Charismatic People

01:03:46 Want to Really Get to Know Someone? Take a Road Trip

01:04:45 How Dopamine Makes You More Memorable

01:08:23 Every Answer Can Be a Gateway to Connection

01:10:51 How Asking Better Questions Inspires Growth

01:13:10 Discover Your Social Battery: Introvert, Extrovert, or Ambivert?

01:15:10 You Might Be an Ambivert and That’s a Superpower

01:19:07 The Two Ways Friendships Evolve Over Time

01:22:30 Choose Friends Who Inspire Awe

01:25:20 The Double Standard Faced by Highly Competent Women

01:33:09 Before You Make That Connection, Ask Yourself This 

01:34:34 Life’s Too Short for Shallow Connections, Find Your People

01:36:29 Vanessa on Final Five

Episode Resources:

Vanessa Van Edwards | Website

Vanessa Van Edwards | Instagram

Vanessa Van Edwards | X

Vanessa Van Edwards | YouTube

Vanessa Van Edwards | TikTok

Vanessa Van Edwards | Facebook

Vanessa Van Edwards | LinkedIn

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The 15 Minute Morning Reset (Do This Today to Completely Recharge Your Mind and Body)

What’s something that really helps you feel energized in the morning?

Do you ever give yourself a moment to reset during the day?

Today, Jay shares a powerful reminder, rest isn’t something you need to earn, it’s something you absolutely need. If you’ve ever felt guilty for taking a break or felt like you had to justify a vacation, this conversation challenges that mindset and offers a refreshing shift. Rest is not a luxury, it’s the fuel for everything we do. Just like your phone needs to recharge, your body, mind, and soul require consistent, intentional recovery.

Jay offers simple, practical habits you can start using right away to feel more rested and centered. From scheduling micro-breaks throughout your day, trying out the box breathing method, to practicing the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique to bring yourself back to the moment, these tools are small shifts that can make a big difference. You’ll also be encouraged to create tech-free spaces, embrace short daily walks in nature, and carve out intentional pauses in your schedule.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to Schedule Micro-Breaks Every 60–90 Minutes

How to Redefine Rest as a Need, Not a Reward

How to Release Guilt and Shame Around Taking Breaks

How to Hydrate and Refocus During Short Breaks

How to Reframe Rest as a Tool for Productivity and Creativity

Making space to breathe, reflect, and recover won’t just help you feel better, it will help you show up better, think clearer, and live more purposefully.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here.

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there!

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

01:20 When Was The Last Time You Felt Truly Rested?

03:39 Regular Breaks Increase Productivity And Creativity

06:21 Rest Isn’t Something You Earn, It’s Something You Need

07:53 #1: Set The Habit Of A Micro Break

11:15 #2: Practice Intentional Breathing Exercises

12:49 #3: Spend Time In A Mindfulness Practice

15:47 #4: Establish Tech-Free Zones in Your Home

18:55 Rest Is A Necessity, Not A Luxury

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do THIS 2 Minute Trick To Stop a Negative Spiral INSTANTLY (Overthinkers You Need to Hear This Episode!)

Have you ever caught yourself stuck in a spiral of negative thoughts?

Do you have a go-to way to reset when you’re feeling overwhelmed?

Today, Jay dives into one of the most common modern struggles: overthinking. Whether it’s an unanswered text, a mistake at work, or uncertainty about your next step, our minds often trap us in loops of doubt, fear, and frustration. But what if the path to peace starts with a few spiritual truths?

In this episode, Jay shares timeless wisdom from the Bhagavad Gita and Buddhist teachings to help you finally stop spiraling and start releasing. He walks you through five powerful shifts—from learning how to emotionally declutter your space and mind, to embracing the truth that pain is part of life, but suffering is a choice. Jay also introduces practical rituals—like writing and discarding thoughts—that are scientifically proven to help you regulate difficult emotions.

With heartfelt insight, Jay explores how we can become friends with our own minds and stop rehearsing conversations and conflicts that never happen. He urges us to face the things we’re avoiding, take action instead of postponing, and learn the art of letting go with intention.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to Stop Thought Spirals Before They Take Over.

Why Writing Down Your Emotions Can Help You Let Go.

The Difference Between Pain and Suffering—and How to Reduce Both.

How Your Environment Impacts Your Mental State.

Why Speaking the Truth Sets You Free from Overthinking.

This episode is your invitation to choose presence over perfection and peace over pressure. Whether you’re caught in a loop of overthinking or simply craving clarity, this conversation will bring you back to stillness.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here.

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there!

What We Discussed:

00:00 Introduction

00:43 How to Let Go Gracefully

04:58 #1: How Writing Down Your Thoughts Calm Your Mind

09:00 #2: How to Start Decluttering Your Mind

15:23 #3: How Acceptance Lessens the Pain

20:11 #4: How to Have Difficult Conversations Real Time

21:30 #5: Don’t Delay What Can Be Done Today

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jay’s Must-Listens: 5 Nutrition Experts on the Foods to Eat (and Avoid) to Improve Digestion and Stop Bloating (Ft. Dr. Casey Means & The Glucose Goddess)

Do certain foods make you bloated?

Have you found anything that stops bloating fast?

This episode of “On Purpose” features a special compilation of insights from some of the most trusted voices in nutrition and wellness. Jay brings together Dr. Casey Means, Jessie Inchauspé (the Glucose Goddess), Elissa Goodman, Dave Asprey, and Dr. Darshan Shah to explore the real foundations of healthy eating.

The discussion covers the essentials of nutrition—going beyond fad diets and quick fixes. Topics include how small daily habits can make a big difference, why sugar shows up in unexpected places, the truth about supplements and food labels, what really matters in choosing proteins and plant-based milks, and how to get the nutrients needed for long-term health. These experts share honest advice and practical ideas designed to clear up confusion and inspire a smarter approach to food.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to Eat More Mindfully for Better Health

How to Avoid Hidden Sugars in Everyday Foods

How to Choose the Right Protein for Your Diet

How to Increase Your Vegetable and Fiber Intake

How to Supplement Wisely for Energy and Immunity

How to Take Charge of Your Health with Small Daily Habits

Nutrition doesn’t have to be complicated or overwhelming, simple shifts and mindful choices can make a big difference over time.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty.

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here.

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there! 

What We Discuss: 

00:00 Intro 

02:03 How Eating Slowly Boosts Your Metabolism

04:32 Why Switching from Sweet to Savory Breakfasts Matters

10:29 How to Gently Transition Away from Sugar

12:37 Simple Habits for Sustainable Weight Loss

14:59 The Best Order to Eat Your Food for Balanced Health

20:13 What to Check Before Buying Supplements

23:37 How to Decode Nutrition Labels with Confidence

26:52 The Real Story Behind Protein Bars

28:07 The Right Way to Support Your Body with Cleanses

31:37 What’s a Healthy Bowel Movement Routine?

33:12 How Much Protein Should You Really Eat Each Day?

40:09 Choosing a Diet That Truly Fits Your Body

48:34 The Power of Eating More Vegetables

54:30 Be The CEO Of Your Own Health

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson: Break the Generational Patterns Holding You Back (How to Build Confidence, Responsibility, and Emotional Resilience)

Can you remember the first time you felt truly in charge of your own decisions?

What’s one thing you picked up from your family that you wish you could unlearn?

In this heartfelt episode, Jay Shetty sits down with former First Lady Michelle Obama and her brother, coach and mentor Craig Robinson, for an intimate conversation centered around family, resilience, and the lasting impact of love and connection.

Michelle and Craig reminisce about the powerful values instilled by their parents, a deep sense of independence and unwavering family loyalty. Even through financial struggles, their parents cultivated a home filled with trust and safety, making it clear that family would always be a source of strength. Memories of birthdays around the kitchen table, houses bustling with extended relatives, and the steady presence of grandparents and cousins all contributed to a lifelong sense of belonging and support that continues to influence their lives.

As they journeyed into adulthood, both Michelle and Craig relied on therapy, genuine friendships, and a strong community to help them face life’s transitions, grief, and the many complexities of growing up. Michelle shares how seeking guidance and embracing self-reflection, especially during moments of change, has been central to her personal growth, demonstrating the value of openness, adaptability, and continuous learning throughout every stage of life.

In this interview, you’ll learn:

How to Foster Family Unity During Tough Times

How to Nurture Independence in Children

How to Unlearn Limiting Beliefs from Your Upbringing

How to Create Safe Spaces for Honest Conversations

How to Teach Empathy Through Parenting

How to Balance Protection and Freedom as a Parent

How to Normalize Therapy and Emotional Support

Their conversation is a moving testament to the impact of compassion, authenticity, and purposeful living, a reminder that life’s greatest challenges can be met with empathy, courage, and hope.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here.  

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there!  

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

02:00 The Kind of Love Only Siblings Understand

04:15 What was the First Secret You Shared With Each Other?

09:53 Raised To Be Independent Children In A Loving Community

14:55 How Different Generations Celebrate Birthdays

17:00 How to Unlearn Your Inner Fears

19:47 The Fear Of What Could Happen Can Hinder Personal Growth

25:28 What a Childhood Encounter with Police Taught Me About Bias

29:35 Being Judged By The Color Of Your Skin

31:54 Racism Is Still An Issue

34:07 How to Raise Resilient Children

35:59 Don’t Make Assumptions Based On Your Emotions

38:17 Don’t Let Negative Thoughts Dictate Your Actions

40:48 The Power Of Good Parenting

48:41 How To Prioritize Being A Parent While Chasing Your Dreams

52:08 Parents Aren’t Responsible For Their Children’s Happiness

58:07 Focus On Cultivating Independence in Your Children

01:02:24 What Is Your Form Of Therapy?

01:11:08 Are You Doing Enough?

01:16:10 How To Become A Good Parent

01:37 What Would Your Mother Be Most Proud Of?

Episode Resources:

Michelle Obama | Instagram

Michelle Obama | Facebook

Michelle Obama | YouTube

Michelle Obama | Books

Obama Foundation 

The Light We Carry: Overcoming in Uncertain Times

Craig Robinson | Instagram 

Craig Robinson | X

IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You Are Not Responsible For Other People’s Feelings (How to Set Boundaries Without Guilt)

When was the last time you actually put yourself first, no matter what anyone else thought?

Have you ever felt a wave of guilt just for trying to set boundaries and protect your peace?

Today, Jay dives into a powerful idea: letting go of the responsibilities that were never really yours to begin with. So many of us carry the weight of other people’s expectations, emotions, and opinions — and it leaves us feeling stuck, overwhelmed, and disconnected from ourselves. Jay unpacks how we often take on things like managing how others feel or trying to live up to impossible standards, and how doing that can block us from real freedom, creativity, and growth.

Throughout the episode, Jay reinforces the message that boundaries are not selfish but necessary for healthy relationships and self-respect. He reminds us that our worth isn’t something we have to earn by meeting expectations or chasing approval. When we stop trying to control things that aren’t really ours to manage, life feels lighter, more real, and full of possibility.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to Stop Absorbing Other People’s Emotions

How to Let Go of Unrealistic Expectations

How to Support Others Without Fixing Their Problems

How to Maintain Your Own Emotional Balance

How to Prioritize Your Well-Being Over Pleasing Others

Remember, life becomes lighter when you let go of what was never yours to carry. No matter what challenges you face, trust that you are enough just as you are, and you have the strength to live authentically. 

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. 

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there! 

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

00:47 Stop Carrying What’s Not Yours to Fix

02:34 #1: You’re Not Responsible for Other People’s Feelings

07:33 #2: You’re Not Responsible for How Other People See You

15:05 #3: You’re Not Responsible for Fixing Other People’s Problems

19:38 #4: You’re Not Responsible for Meeting Others’ Expectations

24:35 #5: You’re Not Responsible for How Other People Treat You

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Humble the Poet: Transform Your Relationship With Anxiety (6 Strategies for Overthinkers

What usually makes you feel anxious?

How do you calm yourself when you’re worried?

Today, Jay welcomes back for the third time, his good friend Humble the Poet. This time Jay and Humble unpack the rich wisdom from his latest book, Unlearned: 50 Simple Truths to Help Overthinkers Feel Less Stress and More Calm. Their candid, soulful dialogue offers a compassionate exploration of anxiety, emotional resilience, and personal growth.

Humble begins by reframing anxiety not as a condition to be cured, but as a signal for deeper self awareness. Rather than diagnosing anxious feelings, he encourages listeners to build a new relationship with anxiety, one rooted in curiosity, compassion, and personal empowerment. Through engaging stories and honest reflections, Humble emphasizes that anxiety often arises when our minds overestimate threats and underestimate our own capabilities. Humble emphasizes that managing anxiety isn’t about eliminating it, but about strengthening our ability to face it, while building resilience through consistent, courageous actions.  

Humble recounts his raw and personal experience of how familial expectations and childhood coping mechanisms continue to shape adult anxieties. Together, they talk through setting boundaries with loved ones, not as acts of rebellion, but as invitations for healthier relationships. Humble poignantly differentiates between true guilt and people-pleasing, and how the latter can sabotage our sense of self.

In this interview, you’ll learn:

How to Reframe Anxiety as a Signal, Not a Problem

How to Set Boundaries Without Guilt

How to Turn Curiosity Into Courage

How to Stop People-Pleasing and Start Honoring Yourself

How to Get Comfortable With Uncertainty

How to Find Belonging Instead of Forcing Fit-In

Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck in old patterns, or simply curious about how to manage anxiety differently, this episode is a compassionate and energizing guide to becoming “Unanxious”, one empowering truth at a time.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. 

Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there! 

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

03:03 Anxiety Doesn’t Need to Be Fixed But Understood

04:36 Understanding Anxiety Starts with Listening to Yourself

07:03 Curiosity is The Bravest Response to Fear

12:55 You Need to Get Comfortable with the Uncomfortable

15:04 You’re More Capable Than You Think

17:46 When Home Is Where Anxiety Begins

22:41 Get Clear With Your Boundaries First 

25:47 Stop Abandoning Yourself to Be Liked

28:34 Supporting an Anxious Friend with Compassion

32:24 We All Have Different Seasons of Strength

35:59 You Feel Anxious, You Are Not Anxious 

39:14 Perfectionism Is the Art of Spotting Flaws

43:58 No More Excuses, It’s Time to Show Up

48:21 Facing the Weight of Existential Anxiety

54:21 Go Where You’re Aligned, Not Just Accepted

56:46 A Broken Heart Can Still Be Wide Open

59:57 Let Go of Stress That Doesn’t Belong to You

01:04:11 Don’t Wish for Easy, Build for Resilience

01:06:11 Fall in Love with the Process

01:08:30 Change Is Not the Enemy, Avoidance Is

Episode Resources:

Humble the Poet | Website

Humble the Poet | Instagram 

Humble the Poet | Facebook

Humble the Poet | YouTube

Humble the Poet | X

Unanxious: 50 Simple Truths to Help Overthinkers Feel Less Stress and More Calm

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.