My guest is Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor, PhD, Professor of Clinical Psychology and Psychiatry at the University of Arizona and a world expert on the science of grief and loss. We discuss what happens in the brain and body when we grieve, the role of dopamine and yearning in the grieving process, the health risks of getting stuck at particular stages of grief and how to move through loss while also deeply honoring the person, animal or thing that is no longer with us. Dr. O’Connor explains that grief involves cycling back and forth between protest and despair (often guilt and anger too) and explains science-supported ways to move through that process in the healthiest possible way. Everyone experiences grief and loss at some point. Dr. O’Connor provides valuable knowledge and tools to help you navigate grief under any circumstance.
Read the episode show notes at hubermanlab.com.
Thank you to our sponsors
AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman
Wealthfront**: https://wealthfront.com/huberman
BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/huberman
Helix Sleep: https://helixsleep.com/huberman
Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman
**This experience may not be representative of the experience of other clients of Wealthfront, and there is no guarantee that all clients will have similar experiences. Cash Account is offered by Wealthfront Brokerage LLC, Member FINRA/SIPC. The Annual Percentage Yield (“APY”) on cash deposits as of December 27, 2024, is representative, subject to change, and requires no minimum. Funds in the Cash Account are swept to partner banks where they earn the variable APY. Promo terms and FDIC coverage conditions apply. Same-day withdrawal or instant payment transfers may be limited by destination institutions, daily transaction caps, and by participating entities such as Wells Fargo, the RTP® Network, and FedNow® Service. New Cash Account deposits are subject to a 2-4 day holding period before becoming available for transfer.
Timestamps
00:00:00 Mary-Frances O’Connor
00:02:22 Grief vs Grieving; Love & Bonding, Gone Yet Everlasting
00:07:42 Sponsors: Wealthfront & BetterHelp
00:10:29 Sudden vs Slow Death, Attachment, Reframing Relationship
00:14:52 Religion, Integrating the New Relationship
00:20:46 Yearning, Dopamine, Brain, Addiction
00:27:58 Culture & Grief Literacy; Protest, Despair & Hope, New Relationships
00:40:09 Sponsors: AG1 & Helix Sleep
00:43:21 Protest, Despair & Transmutation; Changing Attachment Hierarchy
00:52:04 Bereavement Support, Medical Risk
01:05:27 Culture, Alcohol & Death; Dying of a Broken Heart, Medical Risk
01:13:40 Sponsor: Function
01:15:28 Navigating Grief, Emotions & Body, Tool: Progressive Muscle Relaxation
01:23:57 Grief Stages; Permission & Coping, Judgment & Guilt; Lessons from Grief
01:35:44 Grieving Suicide, Rumination, Tool: Shifting Environment
01:47:24 Belief Systems, Religion & Grief
01:54:17 Afterlife, Contemplating Death
01:58:35 Tools: Contemplating Death; Life Celebration, Terror Management, Empathy
02:07:46 Mental Oscillation, Dual Model of Bereavement
02:14:00 Avoidance; Remembering a Loved One, Resilience; Getting Worse & Seeking Professional Help
02:22:15 Time Perception & End of Life, Motivation & Energy
02:30:01 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Essentials: How Hormones Shape Sexual Development
中文 Tiếng Việt In this Huberman Lab Essentials episode, I explain the crucial role hormones play in shaping the sexual development of both the brain and body. I discuss how biological masculinization and feminization depend…
Pavel Tsatsouline: Build Strength, Endurance & Flexibility at Any Age
中文 Tiếng Việt In this episode, my guest is Pavel Tsatsouline, a world-renowned strength and conditioning coach, former military special forces training instructor, author, and founder of StrongFirst—an online school focused on “low-tech, high-concept” training…
Essentials: The Science of Emotions & Relationships
中文 Tiếng Việt In this Huberman Lab Essentials episode, I discuss the biology of emotions and moods, focusing on how development and neurochemicals shape our feelings and relationships. I describe how early infant bonds and…
Dr. Ellen Langer: Using Your Mind to Control Your Physical Health & Longevity
中文 Tiếng Việt In this episode, my guest is Dr. Ellen Langer, Ph.D., professor of psychology at Harvard University and the world’s leading researcher on the mind-body connection and the power our thinking has on…
Essentials: How to Increase Motivation & Drive
中文 Tiếng Việt In this Huberman Lab Essentials episode, I explain the biological mechanism behind motivation and drive, as well as discuss practical tools for overcoming procrastination. I discuss the key role dopamine plays in…
Josh Waitzkin: The Art of Learning & Living Life
中文 Tiếng Việt In this episode, my guest is Josh Waitzkin, former child chess prodigy and the subject of the movie and true story Searching for Bobby Fischer. Josh is also a world champion martial…
Essentials: How Foods & Nutrients Control Our Moods
中文 Tiếng Việt In this Huberman Lab Essentials episode, I explain how the different nutrients and foods we eat impact our emotions and overall mood. I discuss how the mind-body connection shapes our food choices and…
Dr. Brian Keating: Charting the Architecture of the Universe & Human Life
中文 Tiếng Việt In this episode, my guest is Dr. Brian Keating, Ph.D., a cosmologist and professor of physics at the University of California, San Diego. We discuss the origins of the universe and how…
Essentials: Tools for Managing Stress & Anxiety
中文 Tiếng Việt In this Huberman Lab Essentials episode, I explain strategies for managing stress, both in the short and long term, to enhance overall well-being. I explain how the mind and body respond to stress…
Dr. Becky Kennedy: Overcoming Guilt & Building Tenacity in Kids & Adults
中文 Tiếng Việt In this episode, my guest is Dr. Becky Kennedy, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist, renowned expert on parent-child relationships and founder of Good Inside, an educational platform for parents and parents-to-be. We discuss…